Day 3: Growing in Love and Losing Love

Day 3: Growing in Love and Losing Love 2017-05-21T18:54:44+00:00

The Power of Self-Compassion

A Dialogue wth Dr. Kristin Neff and Susan Piver

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What You’ll Learn:

  • Discover why self-compassion makes us better partners
  • Learn the difference between self-compassion and self-esteem
  • Explore the three parts of self-compassion
  • Experience the practice of taking a “self-compassion break”

About Dr. Kristin Neff

Kristin Neff is currently an Associate Professor of Educational Psychology at the University of Texas at Austin. She is a pioneer in the field of self-compassion research, conducting the first empirical studies on self-compassion over a decade ago. In addition to writing numerous academic articles and book chapters on the topic, she is author of the book Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself, released by William Morrow, and the 6 CD audio set called “Self-Compassion Step by Step,” released by Sounds True.  In conjunction with her colleague Dr. Chris Germer, she has developed an empirically supported eight-week training program called Mindful Self-Compassion, and offers workshops on self-compassion worldwide. Kristin is also featured in the bestselling book and award-winning documentary The Horse Boy, which chronicles her family’s journey to Mongolia where they trekked on horseback to find healing for her autistic son.

To learn more about Kristen Neff you can visit her website here.

About Susan Piver

Susan Piver is the New York Times bestselling author of eight books, including The Hard Questions, the award-winning How Not to Be Afraid of Your Own Life, and The Wisdom of a Broken Heart. Her new book is Start Here Now: An Open-Hearted Guide to the Path and Practice of Meditation. She is also founder of the Open Heart Project, an international online mindfulness community with close to 20,000 members.

Found more information on her events, books, classes, and more here.

What do you think? Leave a comment below.

15 Comments

  1. Catalina May 21, 2017 at 2:30 pm - Reply

    I really appreciate the groundless of Dr Neff speaking, it highlights how, parallel to practicing self compassion and inner knowing, its needed to be well grounded in our own truth and self (whatever that means) – it´s a sense I got as I heard your talk. Thank you.

  2. Maria Fernandez May 21, 2017 at 9:12 am - Reply

    I am not alone, and thank you Mindful Relationship Suan and Kristin in helping us ..me come out of my bubble of thinking ..i have taking steps to mindful compassion and it feels empowering

  3. Char May 21, 2017 at 8:07 am - Reply

    Thank you Dr. Neff for doing all the good work you do, and for sharing it with us here! I appreciate you sharing about your son. Parenting has taken me in so many wild places in my mind, and I often wonder whether I’ve been left in a no man’s land by the more famous exemplars of wisdom, the ones who aren’t parents, like monks. No surprise that this creates a lot of monkey business in my head! Anyway, I know I will be contemplating what you shared for a long time. No matter how I feel like I’ve grown, I find there is always yet another way to soften and grow wiser. Thank you!

  4. Katrina Piehler May 21, 2017 at 7:56 am - Reply

    This was wonderful! Thank you Dr. Neff.
    I love the discernment between self compassion and self esteem. And experiencing the simple Self Compassion Break was so powerful. I work with clients as a wellness coach. I’m so happy to be able to point them to your resources on this topic.

  5. tjenka murray May 21, 2017 at 4:48 am - Reply

    Thank you Kristen, your talk was an Ah Ha moment fro me. Although i have heard a lot of these concepts before, the way you explained them and put them together from a western culture perspective gave me a deeper understanding, i can see this in myself so much clearer now. though i have practiced mindfulness for a long time, recently i have been catching my negative self talk and caring for myself a bit better. So with your explanation i think i will really be able to give myself a long overdue hug and leave a bit more of this habit behind. love tjenka

  6. Soita May 21, 2017 at 4:35 am - Reply

    Wow. Just what I needed. Amazing stuff. Thank you so much! <3

  7. Jane Proctor May 21, 2017 at 4:12 am - Reply

    Thank you so much for your talk. Thank you for your generosity. Looking forward to reading about Back Draft on your site. I rarely need to put a blanket on when doing relaxation after Body Balance (Les Mills) as I usually get hot. Maybe I suffer Back draft! Would you recommend practicing self compassion with less difficult situations in order to develop good habits for kids on the spectrum?

  8. Claire May 21, 2017 at 1:36 am - Reply

    2 wonderful people, really enjoyed this. Was great to learn the difference between self compassion and self esteem, the practice and will check out the website. A life-long journey of discovery, exciting!

  9. Laura S May 20, 2017 at 10:49 pm - Reply

    Beautiful and Loving practice of Self-Compassion break. I enjoyed the guided practice and really felt my heart opening up and feeling a sense of comfort and peace! This would be a great thing to teach children and adolescents.We all could use a little help with self-love and acceptance:)
    Thank you,
    Namaste

  10. Don May 20, 2017 at 7:22 pm - Reply

    great! thank you!
    BTW, could not link this video to facebook — link not found error.
    best

  11. Kristina May 20, 2017 at 12:36 pm - Reply

    Love this! <3

  12. Robert May 20, 2017 at 11:37 am - Reply

    As we discover new ways of being and old ways, your dialogue has helped me see that each of us is throwing our lack of self-compassion out onto the other. I am grateful for this deep insight. This became more apparent as I struggled awkwardly in the self-compassion break. Ah, still so much to learn, so much more to practice. Thank you Dr. Neff.

    • Mary May 21, 2017 at 10:17 am - Reply

      Throwing our lack of compassion out onto the other. Thank you for sharing this insight Robert. It resonates for me as a way to understand my habit of expectations from the other, and of what might be happening toward me from the other. Kristen’s example of taking a self compassion break for couples in midst of disagreement also helpful, as was when in state of self compassion more you emit warmth to others. Really appreciated whole talk!

  13. Kalua Rhody May 19, 2017 at 10:16 pm - Reply

    Love dr. Neff! She’s so real, down to earth, and full of wisdom gleaned from formal research and life experience.
    As therapist, I often refer my clients to her website to complete the self compassion quiz and use her work to segue into this most important topic. Thank you!

  14. Phillip Brewster May 19, 2017 at 7:57 pm - Reply

    Dr Neff describes a difference between compassion and self esteem into perspective in a very real way.

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